My 6 Top Tips for Giving and Receiving Feedback
Since my last post, the subject of feedback has become a bit of a theme – whether it has been through facilitating workshops on the topic of both giving and receiving feedback, or via coaching conversations with clients…feedback has definitely been the word of the summer in the Mosaic People world so I thought I would share my 6 top feedback tips in this first blog of the Autumn!
Sharing Feedback
Feedback is essential to enable individuals, teams and organisations to grow.
Feedback is a powerful tool to elicit change, celebrate success and learn. However, when given or received without thought or care, or not given at all, feedback can become a painfully damaging experience and a missed opportunity.
So what is feedback?
A quick Google search will give you lots of definitions. For me, feedback is a chance to share our thoughts and opinions on what we experience from one another – and crucially, to understand the impact that our actions and behaviour (both good and not-so-good) have on other people and their perceptions of us, in order that we can learn and improve.
So (drum roll please!) here are my ‘6 top tips for giving and receiving feedback with success’ …
1. Start with you
Whether you are giving feedback or you are the recipient; be open and approach feedback with respect, positive intent and where appropriate, the desire to support and help elicit a change.
Never give feedback to get something off your chest or because you are angry!
2. Be prepared
You don’t need a full dress rehearsal but take the time, even if the situation only allows you a few moments, to think about what you want to say.
Consider the style of the person you are talking to, how your message might be received, along with the best environment for you both (it might be a chat over coffee or a walk around the block) and you will feel more confident with getting your message across well.
3. Listen and ask questions
Both as the giver and receiver of feedback, actively listen to what is being said…listen to hear and understand, rather than half listening whilst in your head you are busily preparing your response.
If you are giving feedback, try seeking the views of the other person first and really listen to what they say – I often find that this approach sets the building blocks for the best feedback conversations.
4. Be clear and honest
Use specific examples of what you have seen/heard, don’t waffle or overcomplicate the message; definitely avoid being vague or generalising when you are giving feedback as it just causes confusion and misunderstandings.
As the recipient, ask questions to clarify anything you don’t understand and seek suggestions as to anything you could do differently.
5. Make sure feedback is timely
Don’t save it up for a special occasion (like an appraisal if your company uses these) or store up pieces of feedback and give them all in one go.
If you would like to receive some feedback and it isn’t being offered, ask for it!
6. Control your emotions
Just think for a moment about what happens if you are driving along in your car and someone cuts you up…do you shout, swear and get wound up or are you one of those chilled-out people who just thinks ‘nice driving, idiot!’ and can let it go?
Feedback has the capacity to get emotional, so listen to your internal voice and take control; take a break if you need to or mentally press pause and take a deep breath. Remember, we can all choose whether we want to give a considered response or an immediate, emotional reaction – and I know which is usually more successful for me!
So these are my 6 top tips for giving and receiving feedback with success. I would love to hear your thoughts on what works for you so please feel free to share these in the comments section below.
For more information on our workshops or other coaching services, please get in touch to arrange your free, no obligation consultation.